Adoption vs Abortion

Yes, this will be controversial but I believe it’s truth. As an adoptive dad, this is an issue that is near and dear to my heart. I understand that there are many viewpoints but regardless of views or circumstances, truth remains truth. I hope that as you read this you would look at it with an open mind and hear it with a voice of compassion and consideration and not condemnation or judgment as we look at the “heart” of the difference between adoption and abortion.

While there are no numbers officially available that I could find, several so-called experts estimate that in the USA there are an estimated 1.5-2 million couples waiting to adopt. There are multiple reasons out there and to be honest, yes some may be for wrong reasons most are truly just people desiring to be a mom and/or dad. However, in my nearly 15 years of sharing adoptive stories, speaking at seminars, and the many interactions with other adoptive families, I find that generally speaking, these people are loving people that want to make a difference in the life of a child.

Some due to a variety of medical reasons have no hope of fulfilling their desires to grow a family without the avenues adoption provides. They long for snuggles, the dream of bedtime stories and watching their child take their first steps. They understand that with all that preciousness comes dirty diapers, spit up stained clothes and a lot of sleepless nights. They understand and patiently wait for the right moment to make their dreams a reality.

For a birth mom, it becomes an act of extreme fortitude, selflessness and looking not just at current situations but what could be in the future. In the scenario of open adoptions, it even gives the opportunities to have a relationship with this little life she holds within her physical body. Yes, labor is hard. Yes, letting go is even harder, but the sacrifice, though heart-wrenching, brings a lasting consolation.

I have been a part of two open adoptions. In both cases, I watched as two precious ladies that my wife and I had grown to love, were wretched with emotional pain. It was not easy. It was not for the faint of heart. Yet somehow these two incredible ladies looked beyond their own pain to what could be in the lives of the precious baby boys they had given birth to. They generously looked into the eyes of my wife and I and saw the dreams that without them or other ladies like them, could never be accomplished. They saw past their own emotions, and conveniences, to see a much bigger picture. A picture of what the future could hold and the difference they could make in the lives of others. Never have I personally witnessed a more selfless act than that of the two amazing gifts those two awesome ladies gave to my wife and me! For that no matter where they go or what they do I will always be grateful!

While many amazing women have chosen adoption, many others have not. In America alone, over 3,000 women choose to end their pregnancy through abortion. It is estimated that over 22% of pregnancies in America, excluding miscarriages, end in abortion.

Maybe you are reading this as a lady that has found yourself pregnant in all the wrong circumstances and are weighing out what to do. Maybe due to family, financial, or other circumstances that you find yourself while pregnant knowing you are unable to properly care for your child. I hope that again you would hear one adoptive dad’s plea to decide against abortion.

First of all, it is God that grants life. Regardless of the situation, there is the only one that can give life and that is the Creator of life Himself. Since He grants life, He also has a plan for each and every life He gives. Yes some of them have come through terrible circumstances, yet, in His sovereignty, it did not catch God by surprise. He knows that little life and has a divine plan for his or her life.

Secondly, I know there are many that would declare it is a choice. Yes, it is an opportunity for choice, but the choice should have been made BEFORE a baby was conceived. Yes, I know in some horrible cases wicked men through terrible choices of their own have brought unwanted and certainly unplanned pregnancies to innocent women. While those men should be brought to justice and pay the maximum penalty the law will allow, there is a life that often pays the price. In no way do I want to sound callous but aborting a baby because of an adults decision is no different than putting an innocent person in an electric chair for the actions of another. The baby in play had no part in what took place yet literally pays the penalty with their very lives.

Thirdly, abortion is selfish. I have read of women that would not consider adoption due to the fact that it would be hard. It would be inconvenient. It would be an embarrassment. What would others say if they knew I was pregnant? How would they look at me? Rather than considering the impact on the life they help create, they look only at themselves and what is best for them.

Finally, abortion robs a birth mom of a chance to be someone’s hero! Did you read that number at the beginning? Right now there are between one and two million couples praying for your baby! By a selfless act of sacrifice, you could not only become a dream maker but also could give birth to a life that could change history! Yes, it will be hard but the reality is abortion is too! If there are struggles either way, why not consider the positive life-changing impact that you could make on others? I know two women that did, and in my eyes, they will always be appreciated, admired, and loved! Yes, they are superwomen in the eyes of one eternally grateful Dad!

National Adoption Month…

This month, come back each day to read a little more about adoption. I will be sharing stories about our experiences and even have some guest writers who have experienced adoption from all different aspects! I hope to not only bring you “stories” but you can walk away saying that you are far more educated about adoption. Please be respectful of any comments made below. Remember that not every story is the same and there ARE some out there hurting because of adoption.

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