5 Effective Tips for Communicating With Your Ex-Spouse

It can be challenging to communicate with your ex-partner after a divorce. You might ask yourself questions such as, “What is appropriate to say to my ex-spouse?” Or “When is a reasonable and appropriate time to reach out to my ex-spouse?” Because of the emotional nature of a divorce, conversation with your ex-spouse can easily become complicated, especially if you share children in the state of Florida, which has its own child custody laws, or if you are both in the midst of shared financial matters. Here are five effective tips to help you achieve effective communication with your ex-spouse. 

Manage Your Emotions

Divorce is a painful process, and once it is official, feelings for your ex-spouse will still remain. Your feelings for your ex-spouse will vary between another person’s feelings for their ex-spouse, but emotions will be there nonetheless. Taking an emotional approach to communication with your ex-spouse can leave your conversations messy. Instead, breathe and center yourself before engaging in text conversations, phone conversations, and in-person conversations with your ex-spouse. Additionally, make sure that any social media conversations are thoughtfully executed. Screenshots can be taken of your conversation via social media or text, which can then be used against you, so don’t send any communication you might regret down the road.

Set Communication Objectives 

You’ve found a logical reason to communicate with your ex-spouse. Perhaps you need to coordinate a co-parenting arrangement, such as having your ex-spouse pick up your child from school so you can visit your doctor for your scheduled appointment. By identifying that this is strictly for the purpose of communicating for the sake of co-parenting, you can rest assured that you have set a healthy communication objective. However, if you find that you are reaching out to your ex-spouse because his or her favorite song came on the radio, ask yourself, “What is the purpose of this communication? What is my objective?” If you find you are reaching out to attempt to reignite the spark, you could be setting yourself up for disaster. If you are unsure of whether or not your communication has a clear and healthy objective, contacting your Florida divorce attorney with questions will be a tremendous help. He or she can offer invaluable insights that will assist you greatly in communicating with your ex-spouse in an effective and lawful manner.

Set Communication Boundaries

On the other hand, while effective communication is important, it’s essential to assert boundaries. Your ex-spouse might text you a little too frequently, which can disrupt your day and worse, it can interfere with your healing after the divorce. You can assert boundaries with your ex-spouse by stating that you only wish to be contacted during certain hours of the day and for certain reasons, such as co-parenting or financial.

Choose the Right Platform

With so many different types of ways to communicate these days, it can be hard to pick just one platform to communicate with your ex-spouse. However, one of the best things you can do for yourself is select one platform you feel works best for communicating with your ex. For example, maybe you’d prefer Snapchat because it will notify you of whether or not your ex took a snapshot of the chat you two just had, or maybe you prefer Facebook Messenger because it will show when your ex-spouse read your message. Either way, keep it simple and communicate with your ex-spouse through one platform.

Actively Listen

Another way you can effectively communicate with your ex-spouse is to actively listen to what he or she says. By doing this, you can understand their feelings and thoughts better so you can both successfully view each other’s perspectives with more ease. This will be critical when it comes to co-parenting or navigating any remaining financial matters you share.

These five tips will assist you with communicating more effectively with your ex-spouse. If you are still struggling, consider consulting a professional such as a therapist, which can be a great way to gain better communication skills.

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