Family Fears are Normal When Adopting
Educating your family is the most important piece when you are adopting. Keeping an open conversation with thoughts, concerns, and questions are needed. Adoption should never be a “taboo” subject considering it isn’t something to be ashamed of. We had and still have the policy with our family and even friends that they can ask any and all questions to help educate themselves better about adoption. Educating equals less fears. Here is a word from both my mom and my husband’s mom pertaining to adoption.
From His Mom
Since Josh was our only child I was kinda worried about if I would love an adopted grandchild like blood. But the first time I looked into our oldest grandson’s eyes I knew he was God sent! He was our grandson. With our two younger grandchildren, I knew we would love them just as much and we do. They are all three our grandchildren. We don’t even think about that they were adopted. They were just hand-picked by God, especially for our family. And I love them more than they will ever know but I sure will try to show them.
From Her Mom
Ever since I was old enough to have my own opinion I believed in the right to life. I have heard some say, “Christians only believe in the right to life until the baby is born then they walk away.”. They are talking about how Christians want the baby to be BORN but then are not there to help single mothers or grieving birth mothers.
When our daughter Amy and son-in-law Josh told us they planned to adopt I was full of questions. How long does the process take, could the birth parents change their minds at any time, how will they pay for it and several more questions. The whole family was encouraged to ask these questions so that we would be educated and excited about the adoption. Each question was patiently answered removing all the common fears.
I have heard others ask the question “Can I love a child that is not blood-related”? This is a legitimate and important question to ponder. That question did not pass through my mind because I was raised in a blended family that was a “yours, mine and ours family”. I had the privilege of seeing my parents love and care for each of us regardless of who we were born to.
I was eager to add to our family in any way God saw fit, His plan for family and what it looks like is so much better than anything I could imagine! I know God strongly believes in adoption and caring for those who can not care for themselves. When I look at our family and the differences each of our eleven grandchildren brings to it I am in awe of God’s perfect plan for us.
Each of our adopted grandchildren has their own unique story. Each of these stories brings different hurdles to cross. I have been amazed that regardless of their beginning they each have the same basic needs, to be loved and accepted. These precious children have been given open arms, open hearts, and love… overflowing love by both their immediate family and extended family. They each fit uniquely into our family making it complete.
Going back to the opening statement of Christians only being interested till a baby is born… I would argue that that is not always the case. These precious grandchildren were added to our family because three women chose life. Two of the birth moms carried and nurtured their babies knowing full well they were going to give them to our daughter so their children could have a better life than they could provide at that time of their lives.
I still get emotional thinking of their sacrifice and emotional pain they went through to give their children life. I will be eternally thankful to them for choosing life. That bravery and selflessness deserve to be celebrated!
National Adoption Month…
This month, come back each day to read a little more about adoption. I will be sharing stories about our experiences and even have some guest writers who have experienced adoption from all different aspects! I hope to not only bring you “stories” but I hope that you can walk away saying that you are far more educated about adoption. Please be respectful of any comments made below. Remember that not every story is the same and there ARE some out there hurting because of adoption.
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