Children Confiding in Parents… It’s Difficult but CAN Be Done
Parents often have a difficult time getting their children to listen to them, let alone confide in them. Many times this parenting problem can be solved by spending quality time with the kids, in addition to using a little known parenting secret called The Salt Principle.
So what is the Salt Principle? Many times when we talk to our children they lose interest because they feel that the topic of discussion is boring. How do we get them interested in what we have to say? Let’s use an example that you have probably heard in the past. “You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink.” That is a true statement. However, you can do something that will really encourage the horse to drink. Put salt in his oats. The salt will cause him to become thirsty and he will gladly drink any water that you put before him.
The same is true with our children. Of course, we’re not talking about drinking water. We want our kids to “drink” the knowledge that we share with them. In order to capture the attention of our children when we need to talk about something important, we must put a little “salt” in their “oats.” The “salt” we use comes in the form of our words. In order to really get the attention that we want from our kids, we need to “play a commercial” or give them a preview of what’s to come.
For instance, if we want to talk about the importance of doing well in school, we might tell them the story of “The Ant and the Grasshopper.” We might tell them how the grasshopper didn’t like to work so he spent his time playing. The ant worked hard to prepare for the future. When winter came and the grasshopper had no food … Stop there. Let them wonder about what happened to the grasshopper. It’s okay to let them beg to hear the end of the story for a few minutes.
Once they’ve shown true interest in what you’re telling them, we can finish the story. Then tell them how it relates to them and their schoolwork. Tell them that the grasshopper would have done well to plan for the future, just like they will do well to work hard in school to pave the way for a successful future.
The key to the Salt Principle is to tell a brief story, “play a commercial,” to entice your kids to listen to you. When you know you have their attention, it’s time to share your knowledge. Because many children have a short attention span, you will need to keep your Salt Principle sessions fairly brief. Do not rattle on for too long about subjects that will tend to be boring to your kids.
Quality Time With Children
“How do I spend quality time with my kids?” “What do I do?” First, let’s define what quality time is. Quality time is any time you spend with your kids in a non-threatening way. For instance, if you are scolding them for not keeping their chores done, that will not fit in the category of quality time. All other time that you spend with your kids would be considered quality time. That’s all there is to it.
The basic point is to spend time with your kids. You don’t have to do anything particularly special. Just spend time with them, as much as you can. Look them in the eyes and ask them about their days. Sit down next to them while they’re coloring and drawing pictures. Go outside and watch them play a game of kickball. Better yet, play one round with them.
Quality time with your kids simply means spending time with them, focusing on them for brief periods of time. It’s simple, easy, and will do wonders to help strengthen your relationship with them.
Tell Me Again How to Strengthen My Relationship With My Kids so They Will Start Confiding in Me
If you will make an effort to spend quality time with your kids and teach them your values by using The Salt Principle, you will see the bond between you and your children strengthen and grow. Also, if you put into action loving touch, speaking words of love, and writing notes to your kids, you will see that they begin to really feel comfort in your presence and you may even find that they are willing share personal information with you because they will be able to trust you to begin confiding in you as a parent.